<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/9299353?origin\x3dhttp://theotherseite.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>


Monday, December 13, 2004



haiz...i dunnoe wad to do...todae is juz a bad dae fer me..haiz..hav been waiting fer him to ask me out and when he finally does..he cant go ..mornin again was disturbed tats y woke up sho earli..den sis went malaysia..gave her a hug..den off she go..den came online...wait fer him..he call..den tok...haiz...den when he called his mum..he cannot go out...den he sian diao..i oso dunno wad to sae..planned to go buy buk at popular..budden nv go..haiz..den rush to meet eric fer the ug camp meetin..aft that then went mac..met jiayi..sit dere tok and ate..den went hm...haiz....nth mach ..

realised that i've probably spend too time time tryin to please others..esp my family..no matter how hard i try..its no use...my relatives....well..basically im tired...juz now almost whole family nag at me..scold mi..wadeva...the feelin is juz bad..grandma..i oso no comment...but..wad can i do?livin in a big family..bias mah...attention given..no wae its all divided equally..i wanna cry but im holdin back..when can i juz cry it all out?i oso dunnoe y lei..its juz so stupid of me to tink sho mach..yepz..perhaps i reali tink too mach...too sensitive..but im stil feelin terrible..wad can i do??and..to please someone isn't easy....tried so hard to pls my grandma..and juz one wrong movement..im back to where i am..i wished my tinking is back to when im 5..when i noe nth abt all dis 'family bondin'.ytd aunt came my hse..OMG she diao me..i look at her den she look awae..haiz...juz feel that no1 like me lor.....tats y i've alwaes envy others..hu are much more fortunate than i am..haiz....smtimes i juz wish that im outside..and din look where im gg..and bang~ran dwn by by a car..and i juz leave dis world...cuz...all dis are reali too mach fer mi to take..so mani stuffs are gg on...smtimes juz take it bahz..death will not solve all dis..but at least it will end all my pain rite?haha..dun worry hor..anione hu's readin dis..i hav no1 to turn to currently...tats y juz write here lor..i'll be ok later..feel like gg out..haha..mebbe later go lot 1 there...the place mi and him sit and shared how we feel....well take care everyone..!

holdin on a dream that lead me nowhere


=) 6:25 PM