can you hear me_______ . .

2010-08-28T00:49:00.000+08:00

very tired.

im gg to slp nw.

tmr gg je lib to study.

remove 4 wisdom teeth on 24th sep, also me n abang's 4 years anniversary.

want to be with you.

2010-07-29T19:35:00.001+08:00

SERIOUSLY,

having wisdom tooth is like...sigh. it totally feels like my teeth is fucking my gums.. no joke OK.

have been procastinating lately.. im gg to slp soon..at night im gonna go out to study. =D

oh well

2010-07-19T19:32:00.000+08:00

prelim result review: the only subj im satisfied with is GP. a few marks improvement. i'll work harder for gp, will not neglect other subjs.

abang's shoulder is the best! jjang!

speechless n stoning mode.

2010-07-14T19:02:00.002+08:00

i am....

a little duller
a little less warm
a little less interested
a little less interesting
a little bored
a little de motivated
a little less happy
a little less smiley.

bring back oh bring back...

2010-06-27T11:32:00.000+08:00

a quick 5 mins blogging. i had too much on my mind. and i cant study properly if i dun let it ALL OUT.

ok i should hang myself. i slpt from 3-7.30am and i should be studyin !! sigh sigh. no slping later for me. i REALLY need to chiong..

ytd went to cheryl's hse and got some useful materials. and guess what. ytd when my bro slide the van door to close it, kena my left elbow. right smack at the joint. the pain is comng slowly.. sigh*1000000000000000. funny thing was..i didnt even scold him, and he cried like shit ytd. super funny..he cried while bathing, cried to slp..like a gigantic baby wailing non-stop.. this is my baby bro..hahahaha!!

i think some people did a fantastic job putting make-ups on their personalities.. but i didnt expect it to be played on relatives.. anyhow..i shouldnt care right?

exam's gonna start on tues. sigh much. so many unfinished job.

my heart's beating real fast every morning.. not that..yea.. feeling very anxious and its really hard to calm myself down..

nevertheless, i swear to complete my photosynthesis n respiration today. have i been talking abt these 2 topics for like ages? sians.

OH GOSH. i really cant wait for A's to be over. USE IN APRIL(maybe) plus i wana work like mad..do all the fun stuffs that i want to.. hehehehee!! WE SHALL SEE!
TATA!!

im tired

2010-06-26T16:33:00.002+08:00

IM TIRED! but im hangin on.. studied at je mac till this morning. i didnt really do a lot of work but at least i got some concept right now. borrowed maths solution from my monster friend but some qns r simply too tough for my small brain. oh yea i just woke up and has been sneezing away while i was slping..i hope its due to the dust in the room and not due to flu bugs. IM HUNGRY!!

exam is mere 2 days away and im here blogging. haha. aish..i doubt i can do well this time,. but if i do badly for chem, i think i'll jump..cus for the entire year till now, i have been revising chem rather religiously.. the most neglected one must be bio..sigh! i have yet to conquer respiration and photosynthesis. ZZZ!

till we meet again! oh ya..im gg for some scholarship talk at orchard hotel next sat. anyone wanna join?

WHAT?

2010-06-24T14:07:00.001+08:00

WHAT? its thursday already!!

i hate mid week ,really.

im still struggling to fin my revision. to be reaistic, i will not be able to finish all. =(

HELP.!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tired

2010-06-21T19:38:00.001+08:00

im tired! despite slping for like 2 hous just now, i still feel tired. i have so many things to chiong! need to change my strategies. ugh.............

irony of life

2010-06-18T09:00:00.002+08:00

it can be pretty astonishing to know how ironic life is. sigh, actually i have many things that i wanna say out. but not now.. wanted to blog it out but yeah... feeling too sian to do so.

anyhow, i need to rush thru like 3 topics of math and 1 uncomplete chap of bio and AHHH...........so many things to do! but what's gonna motivate me is that im finally meeting my dearest abang later. =D

why do i keep dreaming of things thats like giving me moral guidance when i slp on my mummy's bed? i was just thinking, is it my late maternal grandma whom i've never seen before trying to provide me with guidance through my dreams? this sounds kind of crazy but.. it does make some sense... my mum keeps clothes of my late grandma in her cupboard beside the bed.. so... possible right?

a few days ago.. out of the blue, i asked myself..how it feels to have grandfather's love..to have my maternal grandparent's love.. how it feels to have aunt's and cousin's love.. though i have aunt and cousin, we're not very close.. and for some reason, they had cast a shadow on me for the major part of my life. because of them i felt so...caged? well i guess nobody will ever understand how i feel..

though i know i have so many stuffs to do, sometimes i totally lack that sense of urgency.. im tryin to maintain and keep to my timetable..its hard... coupled with all the frustrations, things can easily get out of hand yea.. its friday already.. i really dun like it. darn it! damn damn damn...

2010-06-15T02:03:00.000+08:00

me so super tired!

went out with yali and gosh it was so nice and eh...refreshing!

anyhow, i need to wakey early tmr cus i have maths consultation. im really scared that i will not be able to clear all my doubts cus i gotta split 3 hours among 4 students.

i want to make a customized canvas shoe!!!

late night mugs again?!

2010-06-10T17:24:00.000+08:00

HELLO.

sad, this sat's falcon gathering is CANCELLED! sad.

have been relatively unproductive since ytd 12 plus. managed to catch some winks at 5.30am. and i dreamt of big bang. after days of nightmare, finally i have some really sweet dreams! guess im gonna slp soon..intend to head out to je mac to mug. ytd i didnt go cus woke up abit too late.

should i slp now? hehe may i stay a little while longer ?

i wanna learn after school's because of you dance. random! hehe.

i've been overslping for quite a bit. overslp here means i slp longer than i wanted. but my boody auto adjust to 7-8 hours. is that good or bad? -_-

MUGS

2010-06-09T15:27:00.002+08:00

HEH HEH~

my shit's chopping passport now. HAHA

i think im gonna do bio soon. after that i'll go oinks.... at night im heading to je mac to study!

sigh. so many things to do, so little time.

tired

2010-06-08T08:39:00.002+08:00

im so so so tired!! hasn't been slping well. i only remembered myself running and running. ytd shouldnt have watch the day after tomorrow. my nightmare was almost exactly the same thing. ARGH!

thought my lesson later is at 8.30. but after confirmation with yana , its at 10.30!! argh!!

WHAT!!!

bored

2010-06-07T17:30:00.001+08:00

the feeling is too...sigh. Im bored.

2010-06-05T18:48:00.003+08:00

aiyo. this is my second time blogging since my com hanged just now.

went to yishun for late night mugging last night with yana! tried so hard to study cus 1) super noisy 2)very sleepy and tired 3) yana that dramabean kept me laughing non-stop! heh i hope my deary abang dun get fumey upon reading this!

once i reach home frm mcdonald i zoomed to bath and watched my fav 2day1night show. and drank a bottle of bird nest. HEHE.

anyways. i wanna watch this show called 'Into The Gunfire'. its a korean movie featuring scenes from the korean war. just my type of show. to add icing to the cake, T.O.P my fav big bang member is in it. drools..........

2010-06-02T01:05:00.001+08:00

i better go now. NOW

you're free to throw these away take it all, back.

2010-06-02T00:07:00.002+08:00

whatever that im saying, i dunno what exactly im saying, you get what im saying?

decided to spend a little bit of time blogging. to blog about my xin shi. because im struggling to fin up my that pathetic few organic chemistry qns. and i have 2 chaps of bio to study. but i cant concentrate. face the fact, i am taking quite a while to settle down and start my engine.

i cant stand styaing at home when im studying. period. i have more things to say but i guess is shouldn't..

not gonna slp tonight. but im having a slight headache. someone save me?

a short getaway

2010-06-01T04:03:00.002+08:00

heyo

i went to K.L with my darling abang on fri and was back on sunday night. i totally enjoyed my trip.. well some highlights will be s eating at an authentic chinese rest, him helping me to brush teeth(hehe..though he did hurt my gums a little.), shopping around klcc, etc etc. this trip was a little diff cus i did study! not a lot though... oh..welll..

yes im back and i'll really try my best to study hard and smart.

i want a trip to some beach-y place at the end of the year!

2010-05-22T12:15:00.000+08:00

seeing my grandma trying to walk again is...painful.

2010-05-22T10:14:00.002+08:00

hello nuts.

im left with less than 48 hours to complete my organic chem revision, yr1 maths revision, maths correlation n regression assignment, chem ionic eqm hmwk, maths mock test. and im here bloggin!

not much mood for studying ytd and today. wed is my gp exams and aft june holi will be exams for other subj.

have been surfing non-academic related stuffs for past 1 hour. and now worries, im gonna do my gp research pretty soon.

stress level is rocket high. mountains of hmwk and hasnt really start revision seriously. whats more, tonight need to go back sch to attend some perf and i need to write 2 articles.

i fear losing direction. am i losing direction right now? lost focus and the slightest thing can distract me like crazy. sheeesh, this is bad .

nonetheless, i'll push myself. self-motivation is the best medicine.

(^_^)

2010-04-09T21:45:00.002+08:00

a soon-to-be- sick girl.

have been taking care of grandma.. everytime i take care of her i feel so heartpain..

this week wasnt really intensive. but im tryin my best to keep up.. but now i just feel mentally drained.

and the singapore heat is not doing any good. sigh!

2010-03-31T19:54:00.000+08:00

my head hurts so much that it spread to my eyes... =(

2010-03-28T13:48:00.002+08:00

hola!

what a pleasant sunday afternoon! my house is pretty free of human noise= noise pollution. im rushing thru my e-learning day hmwk! gonna have crappy week ahead. no sch tmr, intended to go lib and fin up all hard copied hmwk. but.. my granny's op is scheduled tmr. im expected to be at the hosp. argh. have not made up mind though..

what a teary week for my family. its like everyone's feeling upset every now and then. but i think everything's ok now.

my nights of disturbed sleep was made up by a straight 12-13 hours sleep on...thurs? cant rem. almost every night i cant sleep properly cus i cant sleep properly. i rem i woke up choked on my own saliver too.

hmwk hmwk hmwk, endless hmwk but im enjoying it! currently im tryin to juggle between revision on old topics and learning new topics. especially organic chem which..i dont rem me passing any of those test. HAHA! ok.. i need to work harder yea.

growing older made me realise how naive i've been during CI times. getting angry and sad at nosensical stuffs. looking back, those are REALLY REALLY trivial issues which i should just brush it off w/o being bothered by the kids.

well, i think im 50-50 enjoying with my china relatives. somehow somewhat, isnt cool to have a 68 years old aunty? this time .. it feels as if im closer to my step-relatives than the pure blood relatives. LOL. anyhow, my preficiency in hainanese is really being put to a test man.... what a shame. and, its kinda cool cus its like ..its the first time i see so many people speaking hainanese gathering tgt, considering the pathetic num of ppl who knows how to speak hainanese in sg.

aish. time to chiong. tata!

2010-03-21T01:06:00.002+08:00

sigh. what a horrible holiday.

i cant study cus of family stuffs... well frankly speaking, i have never thought religion can be a seriously, SERIOUSLY touchy issue.. but now, im experiencing it first-handed. and its horrible,worse than horrible to be exact.

and i cant sleep properly at night.. sometimes i feel like i have difficulties breathing..but abang said its due to stress. i hope so.

today i tried to study at je lib but my back is too pain, mood too bad for me to carry on.. so i only manage to cover a pathetic bits of readings.

lets see,i have bio assignment, chem tut, maths chap 2,3,4 ass, gp hmwk. darn.......

oh well,let me end off with a positive note. i had video call with dajie n skylar. skylar boy is like so crazy...smiling and laughing almost non stop. nevertheless, he really cheered me up. i went CK to buy some stuff and my gp tutor surprised me man. i was for a few mins in shock. (O.O) <----- like this.

i hope i'll have a great headstart to term 2. pls get me out of mi soon. NOW is best. haha

2010-03-15T20:59:00.001+08:00

zzz~

grandma is in hosp again. sigh.

im tired.

2010-03-15T20:59:00.000+08:00

zzz~

grandma is in hosp again. sigh.

im tired.

YES?

2010-03-13T19:41:00.001+08:00

hello hello~

yes im slacking now. or... ok resting. anyone reading my blog?

sometimes..i just wanna say out all my worries here. but i doubt i can.

my wisdom teeth..pain...my gum, pain..

i wanna study harder, study smart. effective studying~~

taataaaa

2010-03-03T23:35:00.001+08:00

im excited but worried!

the caterer is like giving problems. why cant they just settle via the phone?
i'll get my history and chi result this fri! and my chalet is on fri too!!

i've been feeling so damn tired so so so easily.

someone save me!!

wait a minute

2010-02-27T16:01:00.002+08:00

wait. a. minute.

21 years old is when you want to go traveling alone. as the ups and downs of life gets the better of you, you just want to unwind, stop for a few second and appreciate the gift nature haven given to us. im sadden by the things people said/or not, do/or not. its a waste you allow time to past without enjoying the goodness of life.

i know im not. but i do feel lonely. its ok because i can some time to reflect on myself. but inevitably, my mind will run wild and think of things that i shouldnt. i want to pick myself up. i want to be happy because its simply a sin to be sad. i want to feel carefree. i spent so many days asking my hands and teeth to unclench itself. when stress level is so high, how easy it was for me to think of taking the entire packet of panadol. simply because my headache is so killing me.

you know, having suicidal thought at age 11 is crazy. this feeling is definitely back. i cant seem to find the source of problem. or, was it simply too many?

sometimes, i think i am sinking into depression. i cant take it. i cant take the negativity of life. its too .. bad for health, bad for my mental health.

when that time comes. do not stand in front of my grave and weep.

2010-02-19T16:57:00.002+08:00

you have definitely helped to breed a group of ungrateful & disrepectful bastards who think that they are the greatest, when obviously they are not. i feel so .. eeek .

when i know that i cant fulfil my dream to nurture you, i know its time to move on. really no point. tskkkkkkk...well, good luck.

2010-02-10T19:04:00.003+08:00

irritating.......... very very hot tempered these few days.

i'm done with my napfa test. hoooray!

my cough and sore throat is killing me.

im tired. but the more tired i am, the more driven and motivated i am to achieve my goal.

i must do it, i can do it and i WILL do it.

there's a glimpse of hope that i can get scholarship, that is if i do well. i dont need 4 h2s. i must achieve it. i just need ENOUGH sleep. i dont need to sleep so much. i must tell myself. stop sleeping so much!

but the effect of med is making me weak.. save me.

2010-01-31T22:56:00.002+08:00

sigh..

stressed up. totally.. the 2 girls made me tired... one have hyperventilation almost everyday, the other one suddenly cry during maths lesson.. we're feeling the stress level rocketing up, up and UP. this weekend, im the one feeling it.. feeling sicky.. lao sai for the past 2 days. cant really study.. or shld i say, do hmwk. study to me means revision, which equals to reading and practicing on year 1 and 2 topics. im doomed if i do badly for my h2s. meaning i've wasted my time/money and not to mention, the mental torture of 3 bloody years.

the only thing im happy about for this year is, and im proud to announce,

I FINALLY PASS MY DRIVING TEST!1st time pass hor. HAHAA!!

ok its not much of a great deal to others, but it is to me! rushing str after sch, take cab..haha.. tiring ok?!

drove abang's car just now. total stressness because he's just screaming at me like mad.

seriously, i hate all the cny songs thats being played, EVERYWHERE. drive me mad. i dont even look forward to it. sighx10000000.

my birthday!! aish... can i ask for many gifts? since i rarely get alot of gifts for my bday/christmas/blah blah day...

some of my wishlist..here i go!

camera, hp, c&k bag, trip to korea(HAHAHAHHAHA), watch, plenty of cosmetic, new wardrobe and many more. hmmm if u dunno what to buy for me, ask me okay?! better than you cracking ur head, dunno what to buy. or worse, end up i nv use it.. tsk...im demanding, but its just for this once!! hehe.. ya as if got ppl buying pressie for me......

haha. this post really help me relieve my stress for some reason. i've been having many things on my mind...heres a channel for me to 'talk to somebody'.

thats all for now. TATA!

2010-01-16T10:08:00.001+08:00

WHAT THE FUCK!?

the filler in my front teeth dropped. AND THERE'S A HUGE HOLE IN MY FRONT TEETH

that means, i need to smell that dentist smell again. abang is gg with me..

:'(

2010-01-14T20:14:00.000+08:00

im tired like shit!!!

2010-01-12T22:14:00.001+08:00

2nd day of school and im almost dead.

all subj tutors are fine except chemistry's. that teacher has frequent mood swing and will insult people like S.H.I.T crappppppppppppppp

im tired!!!!!!!

2010-01-09T21:26:00.002+08:00

Ramen + egg + shredded chicken + vegetable + hotdog! this was what i had for lunch! YUMMY!

homework homework.. must tackle them this weekend. meaning im roughly left with tmr.

stress level is gonna hit sky high very very soon. homework is going to pile up like there's no tmr soon.

Test after test.. getting home late from school, rest + dinner , study. this is gonna start on monday!

i want to do very well for my As!

i wish myself good health and good mood.

tata!

2010-01-05T10:50:00.001+08:00

you're such a f asshole.

2010-01-04T21:29:00.001+08:00

sometimes.

people makes you wonder.

2010-01-01T16:55:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 2010!

BUT IM

BORED

BORED

BORED

2009-12-31T16:39:00.002+08:00

i imagine myself eating in a quiet restaurant at pyongyang. how great!!

ok im gg to cook ddeokbokki-korean rice cake. with some really simple ingredients.

have a great last day of 2009! so far i've yet to enjoy myself. =( i hope the korean food will cheer me up.

take care everybody.

love...=D

Are you.?

2009-12-30T04:31:00.003+08:00

HOHOHO, i haven slp! @@ at the time NOW.

my trip to IMH was indeed fruitful. eh seriously,wasn't as bad as i initially thought. I freaked out everytime I see those who talk to themselves or keeps smiling/laughing. But the special friends are not exactly like that. As usual, tens and thousands of thoughts filled my mind even as i spend that slightly less than 2 hours with them. though there are a few who talk to themselves, many kept to themselves. there are many who are very friendly and its just like any other trip to old folks home. i shook hands with them, hi-fived with them, play and do drawing with them.. frankly, i was even a little reluctant to leave when its time for us to go...

after IMH, i went to eat porridge at parents' place. free lunch! haha. went to harbourfront and vivocity to walk for a while.. suppose to meet my abangbut cancelled cus i was seriously too tired. and i took bus instead of mrt cus i really need to sit and rest. the trip was long but i couldnt care much. and why was i so tired? cus i didnt slp well for 2 nights already... probably the 3rd now. thats y im wide awake doing npcc stuffs n blogging.. this is bad man.

and i meet my abang just now.. feel wonderful to see him. but bad news is, smth wrong with his feet. zzz... and talkin of that, my left knee has been giving me a bad time as well..

i really need to study.. sch is re-opening soon..!! i can finally put npcc admin stuffs aside FOR NOW. Sat i'll be gg back to IMH and have cibtc falcon gathering! so that means i cant join them for shopping for food. =( !

thats for now. i'll watch a little of FO before i attempt to go dreamland.

anyone still visit this blog? pls tag or smth.. i just wanna know if anyone know that i still exist here in this cyberworld. HAH.

oh ya, i read one of my junior's blog. juvenile love. and i feel so adult with my 3 years plus boy boy.. HAHAA!! i mean bf.

OMO OMO~

2009-12-28T19:57:00.002+08:00

AIGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. IM SO TIRED.

I took a darn long time thinkin why am i so tired. its because i couldnt slp the entire night! unit and cc training took almost the whole day.. and i think i cant fall aslp now.

i'm gg to IMH to do volunteer work tml. meetin the in-charge uncle lee tml at 8am at je interchange. yuqi u better not be late. anyway, had a little chat with lynn in the afternoon. im worried. seriously. cus i usually freak out the moment i see 'unusual' ppl on the street. well, that's the reason i wanna go imh to do volunteering services.

i think a lot. esp npcc stuffs these few days. frankly, im still a pci. not because i didnt clock sufficient hour, but cus i missed the dead line to hand in my pinkish form. lazy right...right... i have friends who are SCI now. but really, does it [rank] even matter? yes for some, no for me.

well i guess everyone has their very own definition of 'living life to the fullest'.

for me, able to serve the community, make my family proud of me, having my own family[worry not, im not hinting anything], doing whatever things that makes me happy. these are the most important. have great company anywhere doing anything will be great.

i want to travel around the globe. i want to step out of my comfort zone and try new things!

i know, i know. all these sounds 100% cheeeeeeeeeeeessssssssy. but all these are what im living for. =D

anyways, im like BEG, BB and 2ne1 saturated. WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

2009-12-27T23:58:00.002+08:00

HELLO! im not gone yet~

well holiday is coming to an end sooooooooooooooooooooon. and what have i done? gees~

smth R E A L L Y S-T-U-P-I-D... i missed my pre u sem gathering cus i forgot the date. WOAH LAU. but i'll be sure to join the next one, which is group mugging. really wanna go!

well oh well, i guess i'll be freaking busy once the term starts...

there's training tml. many many things to settle..

im totally loving korean entertainments, food, fashion.....OH....

2009-11-01T22:05:00.002+08:00

hello hello!

here i am, posting just a day before my Alevel chi.

went to je lib to study and i've been productive ! it feels weird, cus smth weird will always happen when i study alone.

uh hah! i bought the seoul'd out tix! and baby abang is gg with me! whooohoooo! 12dec 5.30pm at fort canning park! I C.A.N.T W.A.I.T!!

so many things has been happening lately.. i thank those who's always there to comfort n support me. =) i will endure endure endure! 12 more days!

2nov-chi
10nov-oral presentation
12nov- history

sigh, hope i'll do well!

tata~!

2009-10-02T01:35:00.001+08:00

oh yes. another thing,

i want to work to live, not live to work. =)

2009-10-02T01:21:00.003+08:00

hi peeps.

i ponned school today! aish.. overslept plus total moodless. i feel so so frustrated regarding my A level. my history, MT and projwork. one of my grpmate mailed me the updated timetable. hellish i would say. i intend to skip ALL of my history lesson, and look for another teacher for consultation. i have zero idea how am i gonna go through the 1 month plus before my As. cus i realised how much i have to catch up. throughout the whole cohort, i believe mine is the only h1 subj that has yet to finish our lectures. and this spells H-E-L-L .

uhm. im gonna shop shop and shop, eat and eat on saturday with 2 of my best frens. malaysia!

hur hur.... sigh.

( -_________-)

2009-09-26T05:28:00.002+08:00

unfiltered ass gas. hahahaha!

well, yes im awake since hur... 12 or 1 plus? im left with chem and bio paper 3! i cant wait for 2009 to end! am very looking forward to 2010!

i am finally meeting my love later. he promised suji from zam zam. i want to buy one whole carton pls! haha, i will study hard n let him reward me with one of my fav dessert!

i want to relax and go shopping before i chiong for my As.... =(

2009-09-19T09:44:00.002+08:00

i feel grateful to have some friends who is there to lend their help whenever i need it.

aish. i feel so empty inside. im trying so hard to seach for history materials for me to revise on.

i have 2 more weeks to my promos. but in my head i can only think of my pathetic history.

i cant wait for 2009 to end. i must hang on, cus im left with 4 more months.

HAHA, thanks felix for reminding me that the title for my fav song is ' tell me your wish'. hahaha!!

let me wish my baby happy 3rd year anniversary in advance. yes time flies. and, selamat hari raya to all muslims, to non muslims, have a great long weekend! but not for me. -_-!

2009-09-01T21:11:00.002+08:00

what have i done today?

uhm, biology respiration, read thru the note and did mcqs.

need to revise on my gp yo, and i've yet to touch my chinese hmwk.

zzzz. i miss my baby abang and my baby abang miss me! he was telling how much he miss me lah. melts..... we're gonna see each other next friday. and it has been like forever since i last saw him. im gonna treat him uhm.. fish and co! cant wait cant wait to see him!!

i've signed up for a japan trip this nov. have yet to tell abang cus everything's not confirm. wanted to go for the ocip trip to vietnam but its before my A lvl, so its a huge no no.

im totally hooked on girls gen's 'genie'. whaaaahts!

time to go back study. tata~

2009-08-31T19:06:00.002+08:00

i need to sort out my thinking.

Ahhh... this is killing me slowly.

i cant concentrate. this is frustrating the hell out of me.

our world is painted black and white. it is the people around us who add in colour for us. but of cus, we ourselves are the one who determine which shade of colour is being painted.

haish, my gp paper is this friday. now i know what is 'no motivation to study'.
Its a drag to study nowadays. really bad bad bad.

=(

2009-08-16T18:31:00.002+08:00

2009-08-16T16:43:00.003+08:00

sigh... too much of sighing these days.

why is almost everyone trying to squeeze something out of me? im feeling extremely exhausted. already. im really mentally tired becus of my pw. MI is really a training ground for me. Hopefully i get out this hellish place a better person.

Acted as a female victim for my project. I hope it turned out great. there's one NG part which was really hilarious. should post it up if possible. Am working for my EoM now. later will be for WR.

I know my tempre is really really bad. every small thing just spark off the anger in me. its bad. forgive me if i've offended you.

Thanks abang for being there for me all the time. I apologise for being demanding at times. I know you cant be my listening ear 24/7 cus you have your own probs also..

Mentally tired.. but i have to go on.. cus promo is just 3 weeks away..

2009-07-25T23:26:00.002+08:00

went for dinner with abang at jp and saw zh !

the song 'call me' by taegoon is 100% addictive!

sigh. its amazing technology enable us to connect to the other side of the world. and of cus connect to the wrong material. or whatever you wish not to see or read.

how depressing. sad to admit. i do wanna quit mi and go back poly. but its just a thought. i will never let that happen of cus. looking at my poly frens' facebook photos taken at national heart centre. how depressing can that be? it really reminds me how much i dreamt of taking cardiology in poly. but what can i do now? i'll just make the best out of whatever im doing now.

what my cousin said was right. people regret when they're at their lowest point. well, it looks like im at my lowest everyday.

in my opinion, a dream is a promise to oneself. to fulfil it. to strive for it. can i fulfil my dream? i dont know. but im striving for it.

will be going to nt'l lib tml for history research. MUST put in 120% now. i find difficulties struggling with new topics while revising for the old ones. so many of them. and Promos 2 is less than 10 weeks away. im so dead. SPA is coming in less than a month's time. i must learn chemistry's calculations, and bio's recording format. yes year 2 is so damn crazy. i look forward to year 3, just h2 subjs.

its funny how abang 'broke' the news to me. its so so surprising.. well we have a new baby in the family! not the baby baby. but THAT baby. i cant wait to see the addition of a new member! its ok if you dun understand. cus you dont have to. HAHA!

i want a cup of coffee and i am going to chiong later with whatever energy im left with. tml is another long day.

ironically, im stressed out. but am enjoying this experience whollyly. haha. i love being busy, people squeezing the last bit of me and myself pulling my hair.

can you believe it?

its end of july already. and also, end of today's rumblings.

2009-07-23T13:22:00.000+08:00

the worse thing is not having no brain.

but not making use of your brain.

A level chi compre later.

peace.

2009-07-22T05:25:00.002+08:00

so many things to do, so little time.

i have so much to post. but not enough time.

man are cowards, but not all. at least i am.

looking forward to this weekend cus i plan to go natl lib to do some history research. and maybe some quiet time for me and abang. chiong chiong chiong. everyone is chiong-ing. but i must chiong more cus i have to juggle between new topics and the old ones which i have yet to master d concepts. this applies to ALL subjects. yes.

am i stressed out? am i overly stressed out? who is not stress right? but im not overly stressed out lah. i look so stressed that my teacher went to tell other teachers about me. its really -___-!

anyways, work hard everyone. do anything you like so long as you dont get swine flu, ahh chuu~

2009-07-14T03:31:00.002+08:00

@@ at the time now!

passed my bio w/o flying colour of cus. did horrible for my chemistry practical exam today! but, no time to waste, shant waste my energy getting sad or whatever for my grades.

im getting ready and gearing up for the most hectic schedule ever. 100% + 150% confirm chop, by the end of this year, i'll look 10 years older.

ytd's shopping was ok lah. including the johor trip, i bought 2 pairs of shoes, 1 bracelet and 1 hair pin. feeling super sour cus didnt manage to get any clothes. nevertheless, i've enjoyed my day.

chinese A oral exam this friday.

pre u sem outing on sat. cant wait!

am missing my baby abang so much. sigh..

2009-07-11T01:04:00.002+08:00

feeling extremely tired. and totally unsatisfied.

didnt do well for my promos.. the most, an A or B for history.

i realised that im free tml! on sunday im going johor with some of my family. a weekend break before i start chionging.

just so many things running through my mind. some are just too overwhelming..

might be cooking hainanese chinese rice tml. authentic, no artificial flavour ones of cus.

tata~

2009-07-03T16:30:00.002+08:00

3 more papers to go: biology p2. chem p2 & p3.

i have fri,sat,sun and mon! could've done better for maths and bio p1. history went pretty well.
i look forward to studying with uno on sats.. after exams i shall do that!

feels draggy when it comes to pw.

grandma's daily shouting and rumblings is wearing my patience thin. stress level is sky high plus this. bad bad. i want to bring her out, to chinese garden and have a walk. she cramping up at home is making her a little... ya.. shant elaborate more.

need abang's shoulder......

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-26T23:42:00.002+08:00

dead tired. cant believe that exam is just 2 days away.

all i aim for is pass for all subjects. including gp. studying at SIM today was fine.. saved time traveling cus sis fetched me there, at 7am.

what differentiates a B from an A?

2009-06-26T23:40:00.000+08:00

you and me. us, nothing can change anything.

thank you.

2009-06-24T21:25:00.002+08:00

heeeeeeeeeeell-o.

history is making me go crazy! so so so so many more content to filter! and im not done with arab-israeli conflict. never have i thought i will study how religious fundamentalism led to terrorism that we see now. the entire history link all the way back to centuries ago. if you ask why the extremist groups always attack on usa, i would say that its because of their kpo-ness. they volunteered to be in the conflict. so, yes. correct me if im wrong. fyi, suicide bombing started decades ago. but was known to more people only after the 911 attack. (i think)

the Abbort laboratory visit was great. i feel great knowing that its the site director who bring us around the place. i want to do life science, really. aiming for biomed sci or anything macro biology. or bacteria, working with prokaryotes? i still prefer the complex eukaryotic cells. cell biology sounds fun hur. haish!

i have many unrevised stuffs. someone, help!

oh yea yea. wenbin posted up nco course photos on fb. once i saw abang's photo i cant stop laughing. that photo captured me too, cus abang was teaching my group on baton drills. aiyyyy. he just called me and i poke fun at him and xy- someone he liked before. its freaking hilarious ah. i will haunt him with this for the rest of the week. whahahahaha!

crap. i feel uber stressed cus exam is less that a week away.

i want to watch 2days and 1 night later! the six guys always make me forget about my stress! just in case you dunno, it's on channel 173, 11.30pm.

btw, transformer is fantastic. you should catch it. wouldnt mind watching it the 2nd,3rd,4th,5th...... time.

muacks abang. =)

2009-06-22T01:18:00.002+08:00

omg granny, stop those rumblings! i need to study study study..

mon and tues will be burnt cus im back to nus for some chemistry experiment. if im not wrong. only ten people frm d sch is going. hope its enriching and eh..can be in my testimonial. haha.. im being practical here.

have on/off tummy aches. really horrible..

i just charge my battery. having my coffee. i hope to study more more more!

tata!

2009-06-20T23:21:00.003+08:00

'Media reports say North Korean ship heading for Singapore' - SOMEONE KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO KIM JONG-IL'S HEAD PLS. everytime i watch/read the korean's feeling towards unification, it hurts. imagine singapore kena chop into half, you cant contact with your relatives/friends over at the other side. my goodness. im sure many koreans felt like this till their last breathe.

today's mugging was productive! but the filtering of history notes are just too much. just check the seab webby. my gosh. the learning obj for arab-israeli conflict is so vague. someone, HELP! understanding the arab-israeli conflict is tough enough, learning the involvement of external factors is crazy. sigh. towards the end i had little energy for my chemistry.

in the end i didnt go to both the uno's study session nor falcon's outing. cus had last minute plan for father's day dinner. getting together to eat with whole family is really difficult, considering i have such a big family.

need to study chemistry soon. alkane and alkene. LOL. i need another cup of coffee..... im so tired.. zZz..

JUST DO IT!

2009-06-20T08:03:00.002+08:00

hi people.

anyone reading my blog. pls, but be one of those idiot who NEVER give up seats to the needy.

my trip to SIM was fruitful. but the traveling time is just ... saw a car accident along the way , a very bad one. which resulted in a jam. and at clementi, one of the auntie was cursing and swearing at the 4 youngsters who didnt gave her the seat. whatever it is, just DONT be like them.

today there's uno study group at NLB. im so tempted to go. but you know, when there's more people, you tend to talk more and study less. moreover i need to take a pretty long trip there. so im not going. and there's cibtc falcon's gathering at PS. i dunno if i should go. cus its far for me. sigh. its in d evening so i'll see how first.

had maths consultation ytd and after i check out with the girls, i feel so... slow. they've completed bulk of their revision already. ayyy, im really trying hard not to stress myself. trying.

nevertheless. i'll just continue to try hard. =)

2009-06-18T23:26:00.001+08:00

abang,

thanks for being there for me. to make me angry then happy again. ahahahaha!

would like to hear you to say 'sa-rang he-yo' again..

2009-06-18T01:45:00.002+08:00

the one on extreme left is my lovely teacher who feed us with mentos all the time! the 2 girls at the back are the erm. not so hardworking one. the one on the right is emily. she *****. bad bad reputation. zZz. the one next to my teacher is yuxuan. i dun think i can tahan if its not her. great to have her as my groupmate. i cant ask for more, really.

heres the mug shot as a genocide victim. i think my eye bags completed the look. LOL

i dont want any more depressing post.

2009-06-18T01:26:00.002+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE!

WOAH. im so so so happy! why? i felt like i've found gold. i've found resources for my history. but its not enough. i want more! MR A, anything for you! im attracted to you and i'll work hard for you. muacks! you shall be mine in time to come. WHAHAHAHAHA.

only those who perservere and is consistent will win the game. my march of success have turn for the better.

Tml i'll go MI and study. i'll go print out all the resources that i've found. i'll drink up ALL your ink. YES MI you're dead. hehehe.

today we had proj work meeting. we set up booth and took photos. it was productive. trashed things out which didnt turn out any better. see my next post. you can see the bitch who is ****ing annoying. chey. i thought it could have been fun-er. but, nvm..

let's move on to PLAN C. hehe. Plan A and B didnt work for you. too bad. always have a back-up plan as a safety net. now i will work for myself. work for my MR A. im not gonna be bothered and annoyed by you. you yourself is a horror movie. i will not be intimitated by you.

its gonna be end of the 3rd week of june holi. and im like not even halfway thru my revision. sigh. nevertheless, i'll study harder and smarter. \

WHOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO.!

HUGS, KISSES AND LOVES TO ALL!

2009-06-17T00:13:00.002+08:00

hello people!

i was more productive than ytd! WHOOHOO! i didnt practice on a lot of qns though. =(. well, i'll continue to work hard ok! i'm gonna burn midnight oil today. so coffee is a must later.

Have to burn my wed for projwork. i hope we'll have a great time tml. hope. tml's maths consultation is cancelled cus teacher is sick . i've yet to practice my maths. so, a blessing in disguise? so i wun waste my time. im gonna study maths later. maths brain cells, pls auto activate yourself hur.

my baby baby abang is sick! poor him. sigh. and he's working morning shift tml. SAAAAAAAAAAAAYAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNG!

how nice to have someone's shoulder to lie on, someone's hand to hold? someone to be your guinea pig and someone to cook for. someone to listen to and someone to complain to. someone to care for and someone to love.

im glad this someone is one whom i truly love. ah hah. when i look back. between me and abang. i feel like im abused by him. fyi, most of the times, in order to cheer me up, abang will torture me to make himself happy and in turn, make me happy. ah hahahahaha. kena bullied by a brown bear!

ok abang, i was just thinkin hur. if u remove all of your fur, u'll look 70% less brown and & 70% fairer. and hence 70% more compatible with me. perhaps, you can consider this proposal. but the prob is, you'll be swollen for days. too much of fur on you. LOL.

ayyy! crap. hahahhahaha. my baby sleep tight, think less. i hope i'll have time to cook for you soon. i really wanna make some bluebeeeeeery muffins for you (and me. hehe).

hais. the thought of you simply makes me happy lah. muacks. hehehehehehehe.

2009-06-15T10:32:00.003+08:00

i have a test later at 1145 hours. wish me luck!

i have to pass the test!

a cup of coffee and some assistance for my project will cheer me up, for now. =

i feel like going to esplanade. alone.

2009-06-15T01:51:00.002+08:00

i feel like a zombie. really.. so tired but i cant sleep. i should be in bed nw.

have i said too many white lies? probably. i should stop lying to myself.

everyday, i go to bed telling myself its ok. but its not. it NEVER was 'OKAY'.

every minute i tell myself not to think about it. but i cant

all the time i talk to people. all they can say is ' just try' . 'just try' is not enough. not now, not in the near future. it is NEVER enough.

you can be laughing your ass off and say that mine is just a small problem. i'll f you upside down cus you're not seeing the full picture.

can i stop struggling with myself? shouldn't you stop haunting me...?

whatever that i've been trying to cover up seemed too much for me to handle.

i'll feel 50% better if im given 5% of stress discount. hahahahahahahahahahaha. not funny.

i really need to channel my negative energy elsewhere..

2009-06-14T19:43:00.002+08:00

tried not to think so much. but i totally cant help it.

i hate my life. why the hell did i make decisions that i will regret so much?

please please please... let me forget about my past and let me move on.....

im feel so lost, so stucked.

no motivation.. this is shit... shit..

2009-06-14T16:25:00.002+08:00

heelllo people~

went out with Uno ytd. but only 14 peeps were there. overall, it was fun! but i dunno when can we meet up again. =(

i wanna do more for the community. still thinking, still thinking about it. talked to abang just now. inevitably it led to a 'debate'. haha!

we both are easily irritated these few days. sigh! and he is sick.. how i wish i can be there to take care of him.

today totally unproductive. i should put in more more effort! zzz..

sigh, can i EVER finish my revision?

am thinking of bday party for my 21st next year. should start to save up. =)!

night owl!

2009-06-12T05:32:00.005+08:00

hello! im still awake!! whoooooohooo! ah hah, see me die later. hahahaha.

hais, its so tough to master the topic on genetic variation. fyi, i didnt take o level biology. my frens who took PURE O LVL BIOLOGY kept saying that 'oh yuqi, dun worry, we nv learn much lah.' wah lau! how to believe, then what have you been doing for that 2 years?! hais, its tough to catch up, but its my decision. i'll study hard!

many things have been running thru my mind as im studying. hate this. so i think i just blog it down, might feel better.

sigh. but then again. nvm.

2009-06-12T01:11:00.002+08:00

today i'll be burning midnight oil. i slpt already, so hope i'll last long.

tml will be a long day for me! - bio consultation, study, projwk consultation. out with abang!

feeling a little queasy. but i'll tahan!

jiayou jiayou jiayou!

2009-06-11T04:31:00.000+08:00

i should go and slp now.

nights nights...

2009-06-11T03:53:00.002+08:00

*_*!

so late already! yes i just finish doing my projwork stuffs. plus a 'politically sound' email. is this is right english? heck lah. well, it wasnt very well done though.

feel so much better after crying on his shoulder. hais, isnt always nice have a shoulder to cry on? Esp the one you love?

dont really feel like going for history class tml.. i think its redundant. but i cant rem, if my teacher is gonna give us extra notes. i always go for extra notes. cus attending history lesson= not attending history lesson. zzz..

i need to study! arrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

OH YEA. SAT's NUMERO UNO's first EVER gathering! whooohoooo! cant wait to see everybody!

but, i needa go Esplanade and orchard rd to take some photos for my projwork. well. i guess i just have the time for myself when im at esplanade. it has been like, a few thousand years since i last went there alone.

anyways. do mug hard everyone. take good care of your health too! miss you all!

depress

2009-06-10T19:25:00.002+08:00

WAHHHH. im going crazy. my blood is boiling like shit.

1st thing first. i've disappointed myself. really. ate my flu med and i slpt 13 hours. STRAIGHT. and i didnt even study! i thought i could cover many chaps after i take a short nap. and. tada~ 13 hours. what a dissapointment.

next. this is really fuck shit. why? projectwork, there's 5 of us in the group. but! only me and yuxuan are doing the brain work. why not make it indv work? so many things to do. yet so little time. everyone is given 24 hrs, 7 days a week. yuxuan and i spend so much time doing our projwk despite ten thousand chaps to revise. and the rest? sigh... this is enough to give me tonnes of white hair...

IM so wayyyyyyy behind my revision. shit. heellllish shit!

sigh sigh sigh...

HAIS..................

2009-06-09T18:01:00.002+08:00

its funny how one makes a decision.

YES / NO is a thin line away from each other.

suddenly, i cant help but to think again. why ?

i dont want to think so much. its bad for health, its bad for studies.

i feel helpless. really..

emo-ish-tic. sigh

2009-06-09T17:19:00.000+08:00

HARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR------ CHEEEEEEEEEEEEW!

2009-06-08T21:17:00.002+08:00

OH NO!

im sick. yes i am.. =(

well, i didnt know i'll be THAT busy this june until i tried to fix consultation with 2 teachers today.

just for 2 sessions of consultations, its already so tough to find the time. gosh. and i have tonnes to catch up for my revision before the consultation. unfortunately, i have to give training a miss.

tired. i just hope my brain will serve me better.

need some saayang....hahs!

2009-06-07T23:39:00.002+08:00

haha. wassup with the 2 post per day ?

smth else.

i wish what i dreamt last night will come true. it was a sweet one.

=)

2009-06-07T23:10:00.002+08:00

hello!

what a day. went to je lib to study. i was drenched! so yes, i couldnt really concentrate cus it was too cold. the jacket didnt help much. haish! soon after i rest my butt on the chair..i begin to feeel slpy. horrible i know. after some time, i cant take it. and i went to the nearest coffeeshop to drink coffee. to warm myself up and, i really need the caffeine.

my hellish day starts since the end of pre u seminar. so, good luck to myself huh.

thanks to abang, he acc me for dinner at jp. hehe.. despite his aches.

thinking of joining safra fun run. its in aug i think. do i have the time? hmm....

good night slp tight. yawns....

2009-06-06T23:21:00.002+08:00

oh btw btw btw,

i got full marks for the latest maths test.

& 75% for my chem promo practical exam.

a great boost to my morale. =)

2009-06-06T23:12:00.000+08:00

hi people!

im back from pre u sem. those who has facebook can and will tell how great the entire event was.so far, this is the only camp that combines seminar, fun, good food and great company. somehow or rather, i thought of having another blog to talk about my daily live on more serious stuffs. i shall see to it.

just a little on the seminar: we see distinguished guest like Minister Dr Ng Eng Hen, Prof Kishore Mahbubani, Mr Christopher de Souza. Their speeches are snapshot on the political, economic and education situations in S'pore. I love Dr Ng's speech especially. frankly speaking, its more 'for us' kind of speech. the 4 Cs we need in our backpack for success: company, compartment, confidence and character.anyways, i love my group. Numero Uno!

met my baby love ytd. its funny how our conversation went. he asked if i looked at guys. HAHA. of cus i did lah. how not to? we need to look at each other to play game alright! abang i know you're STILL jealous. but trust me, there's only one and only that i really love.

still having the pre u sem fever. but good time has to come to an end. time to mug for exam. 1 whole week is gone to NUS stuffs. exactly 3 weeks left. have yet to plan wad exactly to study for the nxt few weeks. anyhow, the main point is. i need to revise already.

good night people. i'll go mug soon. take care . =)

2009-05-28T01:27:00.002+08:00

i feel exhausted.

Done with gp and mt. let's move on to other subjs.

Need to do EoM for PW. suppose to hand in on wed.

i really want to slp. my jaws feel locked. uncomfortable.

sighs.

2009-05-24T03:05:00.002+08:00

burnt my weekends for pre u sem presentation, totally!!!

though im the reserve presenter, im gonna go all out for the team this weekend (-only-).

HaHs. didnt really helped them previously cus i cant be bothered. but since its one week to pre u sem, no choice right? the school's reputation is in our hands. (but who cares? its MI) went king albert park for discussion till like late aftnoon today, after the 2nd parallel presentation rehearsal at NUS. i realised i have so much to learn from my counterparts frm other JCs and even NUShigh( they are barely 16yrs old i think, i think-) . watched their presentation today. they practically memorised their 20mins script. i wished our team can be better than them. and we will. i believe we can do a better job than today. just watch out people. just watch out. we're going all out. all out.

gp and mt papers are on wed. crazy stuffs. totally no time to do what i needa do. revision? dun have to think about it. i have even yet to do my PW EoM. need to register with nlb to set up my acc. apparently there's someone who used my NRIC to register so i cant. BLAH.

Today is craziness. talked to baby for barely 5 minutes in total. FIVE MINS. that's how busy we both are. anyhow, there's smth that really touched my heart and put a smile to my face. while i was pulling out the drawer ytd, erm, the old board drop on my feet. and the pain is an ass. abang told his mum, and apparently his mum was worried and feared that i fractured my feet or smth. hahaha.. super sweet lahh. but no big issues. so no worry no no.

its dumpling festival! yaaaah00000~. tml am meeting the team again, at nt'l lib.

june holi is gonna be crazy. pre-u sem at NUS on week one, many many pw meeting thruout june. 2 days chem workshop at NUS again. npcc unit camp ( but cant stay thru-out). and other you de mei de. ohh btw, nus air is nice. haha!

everyday i think why i took the route that im taking. no proper ans. today, i think i've found it. i've been deceiving myself for such a long time. i asked why didnt i go Ngee ann poly. i asked why didnt i go JC in the first place, why didnt i listen to what my dad and 3rd sis. frankly, MI IS a cock up school. some teachers sucks, some. the students are no where better. the studying environment is speechless lah. despite all this, im glad that i have the opportunities to join many activities. such as trip to cambodia and other shits. abang always asked, why must i join this and that activity, i told him. to build up testimonial lah. true enough, i doubt i will be able to do so many things if i remain in sp. i've wasted so much time, going around the bush, still in the bush. but i hope that eventually, i will reach my goal. i want to get into a good uni course. i want to have a good job and feed my parents. period.

im tired... but i will go on. in the mist of my preparation for my promos and As, i will try to enjoy the ride.

have you seen toddlers tryin to walk? once i watched the korean channel showing toddler suffering cancer trying to walk. that impacted me, a lot. why should i stop trying? i should try even harder. i dont wanna waste time on mindless thinking. so, let's move on.

2009-05-13T00:12:00.002+08:00

still struggling with myself everyday.
i am so sick, so sick of myself.
whatever trivial matters easily becomes a hinderance to my studies.
even before i study,
my mind is too filled with whatever emotions
overwhelmed by events of the past, present and future
i really cant go on..
this is sickening
and, too much for me to take

2009-05-03T19:18:00.002+08:00

WOAHHHHHH

im really tired now. didnt really study much this long weekend. but im tired.

Did my projwork till 5am this morning. and im gonna edit it later. tml will be the finalised draft.

I just feel totally stressed out. really. when i met the projwk team on fri, they insisted on me being the leader. fyi, one person's preliminary idea should be chosen among a grp of four/five peeps. i think the reason for choosing me to be the leader is no more than an excuse for me to do extra work. i cant explain or tell the story here. but already, they gave me work that a 'leader' should do. sigh. i sought help from abang and he gave me some ideas. thanks baby. it was really sweet of him cus he has to rush off work and help me. im glad you did ok. cus i have no one else to ask for help already..

yuxuan introed me a korean shop in westmall. im totally thrilled! though its way cheaper than the tanjong pagar one, the varieties are lesser. =) ! ! !

its gonna be another busy week. am having chinese oral on tues. *vomit* my chinese is getting rusty. bad bad news. anyhow, im looking forward to PE session! the PE sessions remind me of sec sch days. totally. im enjoying this yo! so many activities. i hope that all this business will help slim me down, A LITTLE BIT. hahaas!

oh btw, x-men is NICE. watched the show with my beloved. =) spent quality time with abang zak on fri. friday was dedicated to the both of us. we took lotsa photos, unfortuantely, for some reason i cant transfer the photo to my com. i hope we'll become less stressful. be ourselves in the mist of our hectic schedule. our busy-ness really suck the energy out of us both. argh~

yawns. i want to sleep.

im becoming less of a human, more of a zombie.

2009-05-01T00:02:00.002+08:00

hi people.

was feeling pretty depress recently. too much of stress . too many things running through my mind.

just in case you want to know if i am doing well. i am not.

did terribly for my recent bio and chem test: Bio-7/20, Chem- 5/14
Feedbacks given by my bio teacher was rather negative. ='(
Anyways, i feel so lost in almost all biology lessons. whatever things that the old man chan says simple 'left in right out'

Had to do projectwork already. tml will be our first meeting. some of the groupmates are f up ones. chey. had to do one last draft of PI. probably gonna get some ideas from abang, and send my teacher by tml night. a lot of my friends can seek help from their other jc friends. me?

did some funny dance with the 2 girls after maths class. haish. they are just pure LAME today. i couldnt laugh at their jokes ah. dunno why but they just kept humming to the kungfu panda theme music. grrr... but ended the day with a blast. a blast means i've enjoyed myself. played handball. one of the few lessons that i look forward to. =)

whats after the meeting will be my gai gai with abang. its like after 54 thousand years since we last met lah. i hope we can go somewhere we've never been to together tml. a good walk down clarke quey or some where over the rainbow will be nice. i also hope that we can go top up some korean foodstuffs. whoohoo!

hmm.. have been thinking of doing some mini gardening at my corridor. feel like asking mummy to get some pot and soil for me. i want to have a pig! a guinea pig i mean.

need/want to buy list:
-the body shop's body scrubz
-sports shoe
-some blank exercise book
-coloured pens
-ramen
-MC Mong CD
-ginseng candies

thats all! BYE

2009-04-24T23:56:00.003+08:00

Happy 31st months + 1 day to me and baby abang!

suppose to go out with him today, but cus he's sick, the outing was cancelled.

thanks horrible beary for the everything he did for me. =) im not good with words. cant express well. so.. ya. haha!

tml i'll be out for the first half of the day. nxt half, i wanna finish up my hmwks!

got my projectwork grouping already. i guess my groupmates are very unexpected.

got 1 radio station ( one indian boy who's singing forever), one hardworking girl, one korean craze girl, another well.. most hated girl in the whole class (might even be whole school) and ME lah of cus.

haish, hope things will work out WELL. take ntoe. not FINE. but WELL.

ten thousand and three tests next week. btw, i scored full marks for my most recent maths test. but other tests scored crap lah. its really a morale booooooooo-ster. work hard and mug my ass off 'ah qi ah'

should i go see doctor for my problem knee? hmmm~

well. i miss abang like tonnes... want to see him but i really wanna finish up my hmwks first. guess we both need each other's comfort now, for some reasons. im tired.. yawns..

2009-04-22T21:13:00.001+08:00

a need to vent my anger.

i really dont care who the hell you are. but its definitely wrong for one to give out MY HP NUMBER TO another WITHOUT my permission!

OH BTW if you're my friend, you wouldnt have done smth like THIS.

this guy whose name is 'JACKSON CHUA' from ngee ann poly?. i dunno who the shit gave you my hp num ok. but its really disgusting when u call me 'darling...baby..' in your msges. for hell's sake. i dont even know who the ass you are.

yes i AM OFFENDED.

not a bad day after all

2009-04-08T02:18:00.003+08:00

Hi,

Well, woke up from the sofa, and sees dad again (last morning).

The mad rush from home to sch, lessons to lessons, lesson to break, back to lesson then consultations, then sch back home is really draining me out.

But i feel pretty happy cus this week's workload aint as horrible as last week's. But i can tell by wed and thurs,i'll bring a truckload full of tutorials back home.

better than term 1,
working harder than term 1,
more attentive than in term 1,
more motivated than term 1,
BUT more tired than term 1.

abang has been really nice, during his off days, he will call me every 30/45 mins just to ensure that i dont doze off. sweet right? hehe. Thanks for being so supportive k abang. =)

Had nightmare again. same 'theme' , but different setting. unusually the person who stick with me is always the same: a small young boy. Its getting scary cus i've been getting reoccuring dreams. and i always wake up getting really scared. moreover, i can remember all these dreams like really well.

got some dream interpretation from internet:

Danger
If your life or body is threatened by immediate danger and you escape it means that you will take your place in business or society at a high position. If you are wounded or killed then you will show many losses in business and love.

I think its the former. not latter.

WAR
To dream of a war, signifies disorder and chaos in your personal affairs. You also be experiencing some internal conflict or emotional struggle. You are feeling torn between aspects of yourself. Perhaps the dream may indicate that you are being overly aggressive or you are not being assertive enough.

DIE
To dream that you die in your dream, symbolizes inner changes, transformation, self-discovery and positive development that is happening within you or in your life. Although such a dreams may bring about feelings of fear and anxiety, it is no cause for alarm and is often considered a positive symbol. Dreams of experiencing your own death usually means that big changes are ahead for you. You are moving on to new beginnings and leaving the past behind. These changes does not necessarily imply a negative turn of events. Metaphorically, dying can be seen as an end or a termination to your old ways and habits. So, dying does not always mean a physical death, but an ending of something.On a negative note, to dream that you die may represent involvement in deeply painful relationships or unhealthy, destructive behaviors. You may feeling depressed or feel strangled by a situation or person in your waking life. Perhaps your mind is preoccupied with someone who is terminally ill or dying. Alternatively, you may be trying to get out of some obligation, responsibility or other situation.

'no cause for alarm' ? i was so ALARMED by my dreams pls. HAH, not sure how accurate these interpretation are though..

the only comfort today is meeting abang to have my dinner. =) \

taking in the positive criticism, ever seeking to look at things at new perspective. I felt usually positive today. Just feeling..... that i wanna be happier.

Gonna end this on a lighter note. Got these from TIMES mag :

' compared with glum people, those who were happy were more likely to be surrounded by other happy people-- even the friends of happy people's friends' friends [ who might be complete strangers] tended to be happy. '

'People who smiled in their Facebook profile pictures tended to have other friends who smiled'

SO,

START SMILING & BE HAPPY

(^-^,)

2009-04-05T02:50:00.002+08:00

hello!

Well, wanted to fin my hmwks by sat. mission failed. went to eat dinner/supper with abang at bukit timah. its worth the money. wanted to go ecp actually, but glad we didnt go there. am getting used to seeing him like, once a week? haha! he gave me some comfort by seeing me after he bought his breakfast this morning. well, it sounds stupid to see him from outside my window. but its more than enough. we did this cus first he just fin his work and he's tired. next cus dont wanna waste time. i wanna complete my hmwk!

Nowadays i find myself end up slping in the living room sofa ALOT. since i have a serious slping problem, i end up waking up at 4 plus. and the really nice thing is, i always wake up seeing daddy watching tv, on the other sofa. haha! its really nice and put a smile in my heart. I've been talking alot to him nowadays, and he will respond to me. can feel that our relationship is improving! great!

Its confirmed! next thurs evening shall be my first time! alrights. im giving tuition. excited but kind of not confident about teaching. i really hope this will help ease my parent's pocket. =)

a hardworking person may not necessary be a nice person to wok with. eh hello? get ur facts right before texting me such rude words leh. total crap shit.

alrights. there's this dude from my sch who added me accidentally at facebook. mailed to my facebook inbox and craps. subsequently added me in msn. so..we had a conversation [obviously he started it first. i have absolute no interest in him].

towards the end,
he said, : you look tall, what is your height?
me: huh?! where got tall.
he: ya really leh..whats your height?
me: uh..166
he: woah!
me: not tall

HAHAA!! and i never hear from him EVER since. went to school and told the girls. so us 3 start to take notice of this dude. and.. one of these days, we identified him and burst out immediate laughter. it was LOL situation, seriously. we realised that he is actually no taller that the shortest of us 3. lynn is about 156? i think i've offended him in one way or another. im not sorry about this. cus i really not THAT tall. in fact, im the 2nd shortest of the 5 KOH girls at home.

ahhhhh.. the cambodia presentation is on wed. i have to do the slides tml. its for pre u 1,2,3. im nervous of cus.. zzz!

i hope baby skylar's coming my house tml! i miss him!nowadays its just so much fun playing with him.. he's more comfortable with the whole family and the environment already. thats good really.

gotta work hard! see u all. take care everyone.
adios!

2009-03-29T21:00:00.003+08:00

Hi ppl!

it has been long!

am currently busy studying. enjoyed myself playing with baby skylar today!! well...too many distraction. too many temptations.

so many hmwk left, and i have test tml. 3 chaps! im like, 1.5chap only.

the thought that i might have a chance to give tuition is =)!!

adios~!

2009-03-10T21:21:00.002+08:00

hello!

Happy birthday to me!

oh well. frankly speaking,i totally forgot that today is my birthday until people send me birthday msges. im having a 2 days mc.. had high fever, blah blah blah.. i have plenty to catch up when i return to sch tml! today is just like any other weekdays.. i wish it is a little bit more exciting..

im still having the dizzy spells.. and its kinda unbearable. friday will be teambuilding day for us.. gotta go ECP to play with sand. im really relunctant to go.. cus im afraid that my fever will be back.

the only comfort i have today is seeing my abang. he bought me fruits and we went market to buy some noodle so i can bring to sch tml..

this is totally saddening..that i have to spend my birthday this way..

tml need to stay back for pre u sem stuffs..im tired..dead tired..the medicine is making me so drowsy..

anyway, thx everyone for the well wishes..

just want my sickness to go away...

2009-02-28T19:03:00.002+08:00

hello people!

yea! Common test's over! went out with abang ytd, and treated him sakae sushi. i cant take it, jp sakae sushi's service sucks big time ytd! anyways, enjoyed with him, as usual lah. HAHA! he really cheered me up. alrights, the face is, seeing him is enough to put a smile on my face. =)

sad, really sad. my dream of going korea is poooof!

this is how the story goes. i signed up for pre-uni seminar and went for the interview. on one of the exam day, my classmate who signed up as well told me that the teacher called her to inform her that she's in. So, since i didnt receive any call, i assume that im not in. Obviously i was sad for 4 days lah. btw the seminar will take up the whole 1st wk of june.

And there's a fieldtrip to korea for history students. i really want to go korea, so i went to sign up. i cant fully express how enthu i was lah. anyway, tentatively, the trip falls on the first wk of june holi

finally........on friday after the biology paper, i received the msg from mr idris.. And yea, i AM GOING for the pre u sem. how to go korea like that?

i am totally speechless, mixed feelings.. blah blah...

im so tired. was late for gp discussion today. suppose to meet up at ten at woodlands lib. but i woke up at ten. power boom pipi!

as for the CT. well. frankly speaking, for the first time since MI time, this time is the first biology paper that im unsure of ALL of my ans. the qns are unusually tough. killer paper! other subj are no where better. anyways, good luck to all!

im now totally obessed with 2 days and 1 night. aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

tml gonna stay at home, be a good girl. gonna have fondue with my family tml, at home! cant wait!!

btw, congrats to gor ZH ! i have a da sao already! WHOOHOO!

hais, i miss my abang... =(

2009-02-07T21:41:00.002+08:00

Hello!

well, today has been a rather eventful day.

had enrichment lesson at sci centre today, SUDDENLY, very SUDDENLY, i hated biology. really.
to think of it, humans has really destroyed the earth. so much that it's almost irreversible. UNLESS there is a miracle, so you can wait long long lah.

greed and self-centeredness has blinded us. the truth is always bitter.

Went out with abang today, like finally! but my heart really aches.. he just look so K.Oed. but i've enjoyed 110%! ate his mum's cooking AGAIN. she's really thoughful man.. gave us some papadam w/o abang telling her. haha!! such sweet gesture really makes me happy!

haish.. went to look for MC Mong and Lee seunggi's CD, but to no avail. those songs i have here on my music list is those that i really like. sad lah.... im a kcraze now. tsk tsk!

other thing that made me =) is that.. I've passed the test that i took today! ok its not a major achievement. BUT, it's the first step alrights.

Im enjoying my life despite its so full of bullshits and nonsense. work load is increasing like there's no tml, so, good luck to me!

sanjie told me caffeine gives us cellulite.................................................................................................................................................... the most depressing thing EVER.

love you love you and love you.

2009-02-04T01:24:00.002+08:00

hello!

Well, the increasing workload is really killing me. But im handling well! So many test.. burning me out totally.. anyways, im FIGHTING! common test is coming in 19 days' time. arghh!

Im gonna learn another korean song by MC mong and Lyn' version of 'letter to you'.
Really like Lee suenggi and MC Mong's songs, wonder if singapore sell their album. I wanna get em!

too many things happening at home for me to concentrate studying.. its very difficult to focus. sigh..

2009-01-26T20:22:00.002+08:00

Hello people!

Happy Chinese New Year!

Well, the first day has been pretty alright. the day pass real fast. But the mood was somehow affected by some of my insensitive relative..

Alrights, even if you're unfamiliar with singapore/chinese culture, isnt it a common sense to see the joss stick as a symbol of respect to our ancestors? Dun use the excuse that you;re a foreigner. shouldnt you learn and understand our culture and tradition? it's not the first time you've come to my house anyway.. And my pure chinese uncle is those type who always ask: 'how many Aces did you get? what kind of school do you attend?' This really prove me right on my thinking man. THAT: getting ten thousand Aces doesnt mean that you're a darn good person. character, quality of a person plays a part.

ok lah, so whatever. But im gonna study soon after this. With my fav nescafe coffee by my side. Jiayou Jiayou Jiayou!!

im drowned in my tutorials, assignments and tests...............

2009-01-21T23:49:00.002+08:00

coffee is my best friend now.

HELLO. stop sending me chain msg like you love me or what leh. wad im cute like a baby. its seriously sickening, disgusting. and you still expect me to send it back to you? whats more, you kinda demanded for it! fyi, its a girl. im feeling really bothered.

REALLY bothered i meant.

i AM gonna kick your asshole tml.

so many stuffs to do in sch. But im really enjoying the whole studying process. but i'll need to buck up. Common test is coming in a few week's time. woah!

me looking forward to reunion dinner! It will mean more fun time with my family. = seeing skylar, playing wii with siblings, laughing at mummy's ang moh! yea heh!